Sharing Stories

Ideas to star writing

What to do?

With a partner share a dramatic moment that contains an emotional trigger. As you listen to your partner’s story, keep in mind that you will be writing this story. You can fictionalize this story or keep to the exact details as they are relayed to you. You can also write in any genre you choose.

An example

Out of respect for the privacy of my partner’s story, I won’t relay the details she told me, but I will say that it was about an incident that brought a lot of grief into the family.

Dad sat me and my brothers around a pile of sticks and wood he had gathered from the outskirts of the house around our farm. The sun was setting and light flickered off his face, highlighting the sweat that dripped onto the wood like a leaking tap. On the horizon a wallaby stood watch, like a leader in an aboriginal ceremony.

‘Stay here,’ my father spat at us. ‘Missy, you look after your brothers now. I’ll be back.’ He seemed to glide back toward the house, which was behind us.

As soon as he left my brothers became restless and stood up looking for something to do. I knew that their movement away from the pile would unsettle the careful plan my father had concocted as a way of relieving the sorrow that had descended on the house.

I took out two lollipops my mother had given me as a prize for cleaning the dishes seven days in a row and resentfully handed them over to my brothers.

‘You must stay here,’ I demanded. ‘Sit’.

Content with their sweets, they sat and began their feast. That should keep them busy for a while, I thought, looking over my shoulder, wondering when my father was coming back.

I could see my father returning with a wheelbarrow overflowing. It was only as he came closer that I could make out the contents. It became clear to me what this special bonfire was really about. I could see the remnants of my baby brother’s possessions¾nappies, hand-me-down toys and Bonds playsuits. My father picked up each item and carefully placed them in between the bits of sticks and wood so that eventually the colourful pieces dotted the pile like a chocolate cookie with smarties. He removed an old newspaper from under his arm and scrunched up pieces of paper and inserted them underneath.

I became transfixed by a rubber doll that sat on top of the pile and I wondered how it got there. It was my favourite toy as a child. It had been mixed up with my brother’s toys and now its rubbery skin was about to melt in the funeral fire. I was horrified and felt to stand up to recue it, but the intensity of my father’s face, who was now standing with a fiery piece of newspaper, stopped me in my tracks. We watched the pile catch fire in one ferocious blast. The flames flickered in and out of each other, growing towards the sky as if competing to be the first to reach the clouds. Still I could see the creamy body of my doll morphing into half cooked biscuit batter. Still I could see the doll’s black eyes staring up into the heart of the flames, as the wallaby kept a restful vigil.

https://www.flickr.com/photos/elentir/3663267501

Key scene analysis: Swallow the Air

To gain a better understanding of how language and visual techniques work together to represent the concept of belonging, it is a good idea to analyse a few key scenes from the text.

Activity

Make notes about a key scene in Swallow the Air, taking into account:

•                    language or visual techniques

•                    examples of the techniques from the text

•                    analysis of how these examples relate to discovery.

Then write a full analysis of the scene and its techniques, and their relation to discovery.

Modelled response

Key scene: May and Billy ‘cloud busting’

Techniques and examples:

         Imagery (e.g. cloud busting images, ‘We get drunk on the salt air’)

         Metaphor (e.g. ‘bursting cloud suds’, ‘strings of brown pearls’)

Analysis:

         The images depict togetherness.

         They show a spiritual connection between the siblings and to the ocean.

         The ocean is ‘home’ to May.

         The scene shows May and Billy’s innocence, which is shattered by their mother’s death.

         Shows how May and Billy are curious and love to explore, finding comfort & joy in the ocean.

         May eventually returns to the ocean, her home.

         Self discovery can often lead you back to where you began.

Full analysis of how the techniques and examples represent discovery:

The visual image of Billy and May ‘cloud busting’ creates a sense of magic and wonder they receive from the ocean and shows the close relationship between the siblings. Billy and May lie with their bellies up to the sky. In an almost Dreamtime-like story, they imagine rainbows coming out of their bellies and rising up to the clouds. May and Billy hold hands, squeezing tight to form the biggest rainbow. The clouds break up into ‘bursting cloud suds’, sailing into the air. The spiritual connection between the siblings is further developed through the images of them playing together at the beach: digging for pipis and finding ‘strings of brown pearls’ in the sand. The earth gives them so much enjoyment that they giggle and dance and ‘get drunk on the salt air and laughter’. They crash into the surf, swimming, diving and tumbling, and have ‘tea parties’ under the water. May and Billy’s youth and innocence is represented through this playful scene where the ocean is their home. They have no fear. At least, not then. It is only after their mother’s death that they lose their sense of self. Her loss is a catalyst for her journey of self-discovery. By the end of the novel, she returns to where she began, at home with her aunt and brother by the ocean, showing that discovery can help one to gain a greater perspective on what they had in the first place.

Language forms and features in 'Go Back to Where You Came From'

Anecdotes

Bahati’s anecdote about his experiences in Africa show that he is an intelligent person who was persecuted for his political beliefs. In Africa, Bahati was the Vice President of a political party. Bahati explains to Roderick that in Africa 320 people from his political group were killed by the government because of their different political beliefs. He explains that he was imprisoned for 6 months and tortured. The injuries he sustained put him in hospital for two weeks. The obvious discomfort is shown through the silence of the men as they sit together. Bahati has a serious look on his face and Roderick tries to distract himself by fidgeting, to alleviate his discomfort. Bahati explains that that is why he fled his own country. Roderick asks him if he would return, and he says that he would not as he has a ‘bad souvenir’.

Activity

1. Analyse how the anecdotes represent ideas about discovery. An example has been completed for you. 

Modelled response

Wasmi’s story about his journey from Iraq shows us the difficult decisions he was forced to make to support his family. Wasmi relays to the participants how he was sick on the boat journey to Australia and that he does not like to remember. The narrator explains that he suffers from post-traumatic disorder and nightmares. Wasmi explains that the smuggler misled him into thinking the boat was more modern than it was, and that it would be a safe passage. He shows them pictures of his family. He decides not to go with his children, as he would feel ‘guilty’ if anything happened to them. Wasmi’s story shows the vulnerability refugees experience as they are easy prey to those who seek to capitalise on their misfortune.

Language forms and features in 'Go Back to Where You Came from'

Interviews

The interviews serve to show their values and opinions of the participants and how they change as they experience the life of a refugee. For example, when the participants are introduced, we get a clear sense of their values from the beginning. As viewers, we are therefore able to measure how the characters’ perspective change or stay the same. In the opening interviews, Raye says that she thought it served the ‘bastards right’ who were affected by the ship that crash off Christmas Island and Roderick says that he fears being seen as a ‘huge lefty’. Raquel tells us that she is a ‘bit racists’ and that she doesn’t like ‘Africans’ and Darren says that people who come by boat illegally should be ‘immediately expatriated’. Gleny thinks Australia has the ‘capacity’ to take ‘more refugees’ and Adam says that we are ‘spending millions of dollars housing ‘these’ criminals’. With the exception of Gleny, almost all participants are prejudiced against refugees.

As the episodes progress, the participants become more aware of the plight of refugees. In Episode 1, After Maisara’s story Raquel reflects that she is not sure how she would cope being in the country the Masudi family come from and experiencing something like Maisara did. She has empathy as she feels that seeing something like what Maisara described would be distressing. When Adam comes out of the detention centre, he says that he experienced a ‘reality check’ as he spoke to people who are experiencing a hopeless situation. He talks about one man who has had his application denied several times and said he would commit suicide rather than return to Iraq. The man tells him that rioting is not far off at the detention centre. There is another shot of the moon in the distance. This shows that his attitude that the refugees deserve the harsh treatment they receive has shifted to a more compassionate perspective.

The footage of the Villawood Immigration Detention Centre gives the insight into the tortured state of many of the people who live there. The narrator tells us that Wasmi visits here and he wants the group to visit his friends. The narrator tells us that in the last 9 months 3 detainees have committed suicide and 18 have self-harmed themselves. The group reflects on their experiences speaking to the detainees. They are all affected by the experience. Gleny says that she felt the hopelessness of one of the person she spoke to and Adam experiences a ‘reality check’.

Activity

1. Analyse how the interviews represent ideas about discovery. An example has been completed for you.

Modelled response

In Episode 2, as the male participants work in the fields with the refugees, they are shocked by the harsh conditions they refugees work under. Adam asks how much the men get paid, to which he is told that the workers are volunteers. This confuses Adam. In exchange, they get food and shelter. They don’t look for work outside, as they are afraid of getting arrested. As Adam hoes the ground, his anger at their predicament rises. He empathises with them, comparing men at home who have a ‘pay check to go home to’ and these men who ‘have nothing’. The medium shot of him with his head to the ground, not looking at the camera shows that he is deeply affected by the injustice.